Lame things I said today,

Overheard by me in the hall: "I worked my @$$ off yesterday!"
Me (whipping around to see the student who had cursed in my presence): "Excuse me? Do you see me here? I am a LADY and my LADY EARS do not like to hear such words."

WHAT? "Lady Ears?" WHO SAYS STUFF LIKE THAT? L.A.M.E.

Later on.... When I caught a kid running around the library when he was supposed to be doing something else for my class, I told him to go sit in a random chair away from his friend:

Bad Kid: "What do I do when I get there?"
Me: "I don't know, but nothing fun!"
(wow- what a strong disciplinarian....)

Katie our 4-year old neighbor to me: "Did you know that PJ Joey ate my toy?"
Me, but in the voice of PJ Joey to Katie: "Oh Katie, my friend, ruff, sorry, ruff!"
(yep... I used my own dog in a ventriloquist act.... LAME!)

Someone help me!